With Hope…

I’ve been listening to a few songs off the album ‘Speechless’ by Steven Curtis Chapman.   The songs that have drawn me in particular are The Invitation and Be Still and Know.  As I was listening through the rest of the album (do they even say album anymore) I came across the song With Hope that Chapman wrote for friends of his who had suffered the loss of their child.  So much of it struck a chord with me.

I’m in no way equating what we’re going through with loosing your child to death.  My son is still alive, sometimes I think only partially alive, but indeed alive.  Burying your child has to be one of the most heart wrenching experiences a parent would ever have to endure.  However, seeing Vale the way he is, is very much a loss.  Many of the characteristics of self harm and ED are addictive in nature and so he is becoming more lost in these addictions and I don’t recognize him much of the time anymore.  So there is loss… I miss the way he was, I long for him to return.  I pray for God to restore him.

With Hope by: Steven Curtis Chapman

This is not at all howWe thought it was supposed to beWe had so many plans for youWe had so many dreamsAnd now you’ve gone awayAnd left us with the memories of your smileAnd nothing we can sayAnd nothing we can doCan take away the painThe pain of losing you, but …

We can cry with hopeWe can say goodbye with hope’Cause we know our goodbye is not the end, oh noAnd we can grieve with hope’Cause we believe with hope(There’s a place by God’s grace)There’s a place where we’ll see your face againWe’ll see your face again

And never have I knownAnything so hard to understandAnd never have I questioned moreThe wisdom of God’s planBut through the cloud of tearsI see the Father’s smile and say well doneAnd I imagine youWhere you wanted most to beSeeing all your dreams come true’Cause now you’re homeAnd now you’re free, and …

We have this hope as an anchor‘Cause we believe that everythingGod promised us is true, so …

So we can cry with hopeAnd say goodbye with hope

We wait with hopeAnd we ache with hopeWe hold on with hopeWe let go with hope