May 2011
105 posts
7 tags
Excellent Article on Eating Disorders in Men
Weight, eating disorders not exclusive to womenSunday, May 29, 2011 03:15 AMBY MISTI CRANETHE COLUMBUS DISPATCHJEFF HINCKLEY | DISPATCHMichael Whitehead was 16 when a doctor diagnosed his eating disorder. He now is 18 and still gets care at Nationwide Children’s Hospital. When Michael Whitehead started losing weight almost three years ago, it seemed like a good thing. “I was...
Memorial Day
Before I get into this post, I just want to say thank you to any Armed Service Personnel and their families for their service to our country. It does not go unnoticed in this household. And to those of you who have not served, why not take a couple of minutes and visit Cup of Joe for a Joe and buy a serviceman a cup of coffee in honor of the day. For just $2 you can say thanks and offer...
5 tags
Wild Night
We had a wild night with Vale yesterday. We had a situation break with him a few days ago. I found out that he was back chatting up that girl (that he thinks is his girlfriend) that was sort of the impetus of this whole situation. This same girl, who is a self-proclaimed emo devotee and who is also a cutter, is the one who I was confronting him about when he first disclosed back in February....
7 tags
Wild Night
We had a wild night with Vale yesterday. We had a situation break with him a few days ago. I found out that he was back chatting up that girl (that he thinks is his girlfriend) that was sort of the impetus of this whole situation. This same girl, who is a self-proclaimed emo devotee and who is also a cutter, is the one who I was confronting him about when he first disclosed back in February....
Guest Blogger: Kathleen Freeman
I have been so honored to ‘meet’ and make so many wonderful friends on Twitter who are either walking this journey now, or have walked it. They embrace you into their community, stand shoulder to shoulder with you and help you learn you are not alone.Thank you, Vale’s Mom, for inviting me onto your blog. I have met so many brave, wonderful and kind people on twitter. A...
6 tags
Catching Up
Seems like it’s been forever since I just wrote about the goings on with Vale. I’m going to use the next couple of posts for just that. I guess the distraction from the ‘Vale Trail’ is largely due to the fact that sexual abuse never touches just one life, does it? One of the larger developments around her is that Vale has asked to be placed in a hospital or day treatment...
Men talk about sexual abuse - 4 - Taking control
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hRospBhNwfo&feature=player_embedded[/youtube] **Warning, the speaker does use the f-word in his commentary. If this is an area of sensitivity to you, perhaps you’d rather refrain from watching.
Taking control →
I got sick of my life going round in circles and decided that I am needing and worthy of something better, but I had to find it. I had to take all the steps needed to overcome the bad that was inflicted on me in childhood. That meant taking control of my life finding supportive people to encourage me as I told my story, my secret. I have had to move aside those that would drag me down so that I...
Throttle Prevention
Having guest bloggers was a blessing in more than one way. Obviously, it’s a blessing because you all got to hear other voices of other survivors. I think that’s a benefit to anyone. But also, the last few days here have been pretty rough and it would have been difficult to keep the blog up under those circumstances. If you would forgive me, but I’m going to use today’s...
More from RMarie Quartermane
My guest blogger also so graciously provided a poem for us to post. I wanted to give it its own post. Her poem claims that she is no hero, but you are wrong, friend. Your life is a testament to your heroism.Who Will Stand In Their Darkness, Breaking Silence If in trials we find strength and in being weak we are made strong, If love brings compassion and hope for tomorrow, If time heals the...
1 tag
Another guest blogger today!! So thrilled, check it out! http://bit.ly/msUykD
Guest Blogger: Mamaduck
My next guest blogger is an amazing woman. She has authored an autobiography which is, honestly, a very difficult read. It candidly yet sensitively details her life within a child pedophile ring and human trafficking. I couldn’t believe that such a world like this exists, but indeed it does. I applaud her bravery, and thank her for allowing me to post an excerpt from her book. **Please...
1 tag
@MarleysMission @AprilLoposky @HaggertyHR Zachary remembered, resting in the arms of his Loving Savior. Our fight continues!
1 tag
http://bit.ly/mlzwjm So excited to have another guest blogger! Please read her post! Thx @ambergideon
5 tags
Guest Blogger: Amber Gideon
Again, so privileged to have another guest blogger. I love her writing, and I think you will to!When I went public about my sexual assault a very good friend of mine said something that I think will stick with me forever. He said, “I don’t see you as a victim. I see you. I see Amber.”It gave me pause because up until recently I think I’d been living my life as a victim. I would...
3 tags
6 tags
Tweetdeck Blowing Up!
I don’t want to bomb you a bazillion posts so can I just throw a bunch of stuff out to you?
First of all, we have our very first guest blogger! Check it out! http://fortheboysfromthismom.com So proud, so honored!
Coached into Silence has posted some ‘teasers’ about their documentary on YouTube. You have *got* to see them! Maybe I’ll post them as video links.. hmmm....
3 tags
Guest Blogger: Mother4Justice
I am so honored to be able to feature some guest bloggers. This is my very first one. I hope you enjoy it, and be sure to visit her blog. It’s worth your time. Thank you so much for writing this for our blog. Guest Blog. The End Before The BeginningI can only briefly explain my situation. The reason is I cannot talk about certain events as we are awaiting a trail date and of course most...
5 tags
A Mind Lost, Part 2
I just want to tell you up front that I don’t do the whole Part 1, Part 2 thing because I am trying to build tension and draw back readers. I just get concerned that my posts are too long and the tedium will drive you to tears. So I break it up to cut down on ennui.
I ended the last post with Vale’s disclosure. Now, I’m not going to say that everything that’s happened...
6 tags
A Mind Lost, Part 1
My oldest one. He’s 20. I think he may have gone mad.
Just a little back ground. We adopted our oldest when he was 16 yrs old, and he came to live with us just shy of his 15th birthday. Everyone thought he was the most amazing kid, growing up as he did…
Okay, quick aside, he just literally left for work. Almost late. Again. He had his socks in his hands and his shoes on his...
6 tags
A Mind Lost, Part 2
I just want to tell you up front that I don’t do the whole Part 1, Part 2 thing because I am trying to build tension and draw back readers. I just get concerned that my posts are too long and the tedium will drive you to tears. So I break it up to cut down on ennui. I ended the last post with Vale’s disclosure. Now, I’m not going to say that everything that’s happened...
3 tags
Survivor's skills
I have come to terms with coming to terms. I am not afraid anymore. I am going to be okay. ~Erin R. of Earthquakes and HeartacheWords from an amazing girl, who happens to be a rape victim survivor. So proud of her!
4 tags
A brave girl said...
thebeautyinforgetting:
I have come to terms with coming to terms.
I am not afraid anymore. I am going to be okay.
I love it! Good girl!!!
5 tags
A Mind Lost, Part 1
My oldest one. He’s 20. I think he may have gone mad. Just a little back ground. We adopted our oldest when he was 16 yrs old, and he came to live with us just shy of his 15th birthday. Everyone thought he was the most amazing kid, growing up as he did… Okay, quick aside, he just literally left for work. Almost late. Again. He had his socks in his hands and his shoes on his...
A side note to the previous post
I did end up going into to watch Vale sleep.. some of the soft light of sunrise was creeping in, so I was able to see him. Funny, he did wake a little and it seemed as if he thought, “oh it’s you again” and went right back to sleep. I wonder if it brings him some comfort to know I’m watching over him in his sleep. Maybe I’ll ask him that one day.
...
3 tags
So here it is. It’s 4:00 AM and I’m on my computer blogging. I just can’t sleep, and you know, I don’t even feel tired. I spent the majority of the night dreaming about Vale, that something was wrong and I was afraid. The odd part is, I found that the awake part of my mind trying to sooth my asleep and dreaming part of my mind in an unusual way. It seemed that I would...
3 tags
A side note to the previous post
I did end up going into to watch Vale sleep.. some of the soft light of sunrise was creeping in, so I was able to see him. Funny, he did wake a little and it seemed as if he thought, “oh it’s you again” and went right back to sleep. I wonder if it brings him some comfort to know I’m watching over him in his sleep. Maybe I’ll ask him that one day.
7 tags
So here it is. It’s 4:00 AM and I’m on my computer blogging. I just can’t sleep, and you know, I don’t even feel tired. I spent the majority of the night dreaming about Vale, that something was wrong and I was afraid. The odd part is, I found that the awake part of my mind trying to sooth my asleep and dreaming part of my mind in an unusual way. It seemed that I would...
4 tags
Just a few days left...
There is only 8 days left for you to make your mark, take your stand and put your money where your mouth is when it comes to sexual assault. Coached into Silence is a documentary that needs to be made, and your help is needed.
These abuses know no boundaries and we are determined to represent the full scope of this issue. Children of all ages and ethnicities, of every socioeconomic status,...
4 tags
Fallout: More delicate issues
This posting will be brief and more sketchy. Fallout occurs in even the more intimate of moments. Thoughts about what your child went through enters into your mind even then. It can be quite difficult to push through the invading images. The irony of that is, in trauma, you need the connection with your spouse more than before. But because your child was sexually assaulted you can easily slip...
5 tags
A Big Announcement!
For the Boys ~ From this Mom now has it’s own domain!!!! Yep we jumped into the ‘big time’ and paid for our own site. Pretty fancy huh?
So why did we do it, and what does it mean. We would like to reach as many families going through what we are going through as possible. Having our own domain would allow more thoroughfare. We were also advised that having our own domain...
Where Was I
Where Was IIn my mind I see you there, crying by your bedI see him screaming down at youHow could he curse you for being bornI’m trying hard to reach out to you but I am not thereWe are in two different places and we cannot meetMy nightmares are of never being able to reach youI feel as though I have left you there back in timeHas he taken you from me foreverTell me where was I when you...
4 tags
Golden Joinery
Washington Post Article I read at the preceding website about this rare but beautiful pottery. Kintsugi means “golden joinery” in Japanese, and it refers to the art of fixing broken ceramics with a lacquer resin made to look like solid gold. Chances are, a vessel fixed by kintsugi will look more gorgeous, and more precious, than before it was fractured. Hmmm, the Japanese know their...
5 tags
Fallout: More delicate issues
This posting will be brief and more sketchy.
Fallout occurs in even the more intimate of moments. Thoughts about what your child went through enters into your mind even then. It can be quite difficult to push through the invading images. The irony of that is, in trauma, you need the connection with your spouse more than before. But because your child was sexually assaulted you can easily slip...
2 tags
Anonymous Asks...
Hello there. I havent talked to you in a while, and something really weird has happened. My boyfriend told me this weekend that he has bulimia. He knows he’s not fat - he’s actually very athletic, in shape, and thin - but he says he just does it after he is stressed and eats a lot. I am scared for him and only his family and I know. His family doesn’t know that he still does it -...
3 tags
Anonymous Asks....
Hello there. I havent talked to you in a while, and something really weird has happened. My boyfriend told me this weekend that he has bulimia. He knows hes not fat - hes actually very athletic, in shape, and thin - but he says he just does it after he is stressed and eats alot. I am scared for him and only his family and I know. His family doesnt know that he still does it - they think...
7 tags
More from Art Therapy
This is another example of what our family has done in art therapy. The real purpose of posting it is to enlighten another family about what may occur in these types of treatments.
The therapist gave each of us a piece of paper and various drawing implements; pencils, markers, crayons etc. She asked each of us to make some sort of scribble on each of our pages, an idea that appalled Vale....
7 tags
More from Art Therapy
This is another example of what our family has done in art therapy. The real purpose of posting it is to enlighten another family about what may occur in these types of treatments. The therapist gave each of us a piece of paper and various drawing implements; pencils, markers, crayons etc. She asked each of us to make some sort of scribble on each of our pages, an idea that appalled Vale. I...
“When one said to me, the other day, ‘I cannot trust Christ,’ I enquired, ‘Can...”
– ~Charles Spurgeon-1893
“In the greatness of our troubles there may often be space for the greater...”
– ~Charles Spurgeon, 1895
“When one said to me, the other day, ‘I cannot trust Christ,’ I enquired, ‘Can...”
– “… the other day, ‘I cannot trust Christ,’ I enquired, ‘Can you trust me?’ And when the quick reply was, as it ought to be from a hearer to a minister, ‘Yes, Sir, I do trust you,’ I said, ‘Well, then, you certainly can trust the Lord Jesus Christ, for He is infinitely more worthy of...
“In the greatness of our troubles there may often be space for the greater...”
– “… of our troubles there may often be space for the greater display of the goodness of God!” ~Charles Spurgeon, 1895
6 tags
Examples
There are so many things I want to blog about that all the noise from them dancing around in my head is making it difficult to actually post something. Ridiculous right?
Something that’s been troubling me for a while is inviting those younger members from my church to read this blog. I did it for Vale’s sake because if they have greater understanding they would have a greater...
6 tags
Examples
There are so many things I want to blog about that all the noise from them dancing around in my head is making it difficult to actually post something. Ridiculous right? Something that’s been troubling me for a while is inviting those younger members from my church to read this blog. I did it for Vale’s sake because if they have greater understanding they would have a greater ability to help him...
6 tags
Is it just depression?
I don’t wanna do *anything*. I just want to sleep. I want to go lie down with Vale curled up next to me under weighty comforters creating seclusion, where I know he’s safe, I can feel the warmth of is living body, breathe in that spicy smell that means him and just sleep… and sleep… and sleep.
I’m the mom, trying to keep 6 children motivated and on track and I...
6 tags
Is it just depression?
I don’t wanna do *anything*. I just want to sleep. I want to go lie down with Vale curled up next to me under weighty comforters creating seclusion, where I know he’s safe, I can feel the warmth of is living body, breathe in that spicy smell that means him and just sleep… and sleep… and sleep. I’m the mom, trying to keep 6 children motivated and on track and I don’t want to do anything myself....
8 tags
You Go!
I’m sitting in the park as I post, watching Vale play basketball with his peers. So what, right? He’s playing in a t-shirt, exposing those scarred arms. Took him over an hour to get the courage to go, but he did it, with Payne by his side of course.
Take that self mutilation, you bastard!
8 tags
You Go!
I’m sitting in the park as I post, watching Vale play basketball with his peers. So what, right? He’s playing in a t-shirt, exposing those scarred arms. Took him over an hour to get the courage to go, but he did it, with Payne by his side of course. Take that self mutilation, you bastard!
4 tags
No one can do anything right (a reblog)
dreamingwakingrelapsing: No, seriously. On our side if we are happy people want to know how much we have cut to be that normal, that happy. But sometimes people think you are suddenly all better. No more cutting because of one great day. And then there’s the other side. How it feels to have someone constantly questioning you… Are you upset? Are you going to cut? You seem happy, how much have you...
